Meet Darwich: The East-West Freak
By Tarek Atia

Meet Darwich, an Egyptian-American who was born in Egypt, brought up in the United States, then came back to Egypt to work and live. Darwich's story is an interactive web-based tale, where you will be able to navigate through Darwich's adventures in any order you choose by using the links in the text. You can start anywhere and finish anywhere, and join in at any time.

By Tarek Atia

Too far to see

While picking up his contact lenses during a visit to the States, Darwich discovers just how blind some people can be

Most people -- including Americans -- go nuts when they hear that Darwich is from Egypt. Everybody loves King Tut -- and there's just something irresistible about the mysticism of the land of the pyramids.

That's why Darwich was so surprised by the woman behind the counter at America's Best Contacts and Eyeglasses in Rockville, Maryland on the last day of one of his trips back to the States. Darwich was trying to pick up his contact lenses, but the woman at the counter -- a tall, thin bleached blond -- didn't want to give them to him because he had missed the required course on how to wear them.

"But I'm leaving the country later today," Darwich pleaded with her. "I need them now."

"Where are you going?" the blond asked.

"To Egypt."

"Is it a vacation?"

"No, I work there."

"Really," she said, "I had an uncle who used to work there. He asked me to come over and visit him once but I wouldn't do it."

"Really, why not?"

"I don't know... I wouldn't want to go to a place like that."

"You wouldn't, huh..." Darwich said. He was trying to remain friendly -- after all, she had his contacts. "So, your uncle worked in Egypt?" he asked her.

"Oh, I don't know. Egypt, Pakistan, Vietnam... One of those places."

Darwich was dumb-struck. "You just lump all those countries together like that," he practically cried out. "You think they're all the same?"

"Yeah," she said, not missing a beat, "They're all pretty distasteful places. I mean I wouldn't ever want to go there or anything. I don't know how my uncle could stand it. They must have really been paying him well. Anyway, he seemed to like that kind of thing."

"So you wouldn't even want to visit?" Darwich wanted to make sure.

"No, are you kidding? I went to Germany once, but I didn't like it that much. I mean it's okay, but I'd definitely rather go to Tahiti, or the Bahamas, or Jamaica. Actually, I'm going to Jamaica in..." She counted three months on her fingers... "November..."

Just then, another employee, a black woman carrying a box full of contact lenses, came up to the counter to pick up a receipt. "Guess what?" the blond said to her, pointing at Darwich. "He hasn't taken the course, but he still wants to take his contact lenses with him because he's going to Eee-Gipt today!"

"Oooh," the black woman said, her voice hinting at hidden dreams of the mysteries of the Negro Pharaohs. "Are you going on vacation?" she asked Darwich.

"No," said the blond, choosing to answer for him. "He works there -- his boss is King Tut."

So she knows after all, Darwich thought to himself. He laughed about it later, and thought, it's time to go home.

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